This is such an important statement.
Those who cannot sit with their own pain are often those who turn to drugs and alcohol. They want to be in any reality other than the one the moment provides. The emotional pain in our lives is as valuable to us as is physical pain. We count on physical pain to alert us to the fact there is something wrong. If we feel a pain in our leg we stop walking on it, we are directed to the spot the pain comes from, and we seek help. We should use the emotional pain as the same. It is not telling us about what is wrong with other people, it is telling us where we have a weakness and where we need to direct our own attention within ourselves.
Being “comfortable” with our own emotional and spiritual pain allows us to own it. We are responsible for ourselves. Until we get that we are stuck in life in a rut where we will constantly be telling the world how everyone else is out to get us, how we are always the victim and how nothing is ever our fault. Sadly, some people spend their whole lives in that rut and never grow to see the magnitude of possibilities that suddenly unfold when you own yourself and ergo the world in front of you.
People who cannot take responsibilities burn bridges and people in their lives with regularity. They are the most destructive forces we have around us because they are simply not teachable. They are so focused on themselves and their own needs that they can never consider anyone else. Lies and manipulation become such a way of life for them that they actually believe them.
These are the people, that sadly, the rest of us often have to simply eliminate from our lives, putting up protective barriers to mitigate the damage they cause. We can still love them even though we may never like they things they do, but none of us can afford to take on their issues and problems because these people never resolve one before creating others. They take even the smallest of changes and build them into huge mountains, lining people up against one another, while they sit back happy that their deflection has directed everyone well away from the source – them.
Parents must teach their children to take responsibility for their actions. They must enforce the consequences and never try to excuse of justify the ill behaviour of their child because if you are going to do it when they are a child, you had better prepare yourself for needing to do it throughout their adulthood, and while childhood is a mere 18 years, adulthood is decades with serious problems and much more serious consequences.