Wow did we miss the mark on this one, IF the whole purpose of education is to make people windows and not mirrors. I was drop kicked in school for daring to open a window, my kids were drop kicked and my grand kids are being drop kicked. Looking at the material for schooling today it is mind numbing. The premise that you start from is almost so nonsensical as to seem a joke. A person has to shut off their critical thinking and just adopt the premise as set forth by the teacher. The only thing I am learning in the straight jacket called education is that I made it miles from my “box” … I can’t even see my box anymore. I have appreciated that my thinking has not been that narrow or that limited for eons.
But back to the idea of being a window – and then the purpose is to illuminate the world around us and that includes the people in it. We illuminate them by supporting and encouraging them to open their own window.
The last poster and comments lead us to this one. I do get tired of endless “awfulizing” where everyone sits around and talks about doom and gloom and what they read and saw and it is all negative negative negative. There is a point, on the road to being informed, where people can become so immersed in it that they are like ambulance chasers and talking with them is like someone rolling out all the body parts at the accident scene, wanting you to get the same “high” they are experiencing from “sharing.”
I like to discuss the problems so we have a good idea of what it is and what it could be, but I also like to talk about solutions. I also want to move it through the hysteria and fear to a place where we acknowledge our own power and refute those who would try to control us.
I remember, as a child, hearing the adults talk about the end of the world (which they were adamant was going to happen any day) and laying awake at night worrying about it. There was no “plan.” There was nothing but the terror and the horror and the speculation of how bad it would be. If the adults had no ability to do anything about it, what could I do?
I never want to leave another human being feeling that way.
And it is so easy to do that.
We become as bad as the nightly news we shun for their manipulation. It doesn’t matter that our info might be more factual. We need to get beyond that and talk about what we can do and get busy. We need to let people know the things they can do right now. We need to create small jobs as well as the big jobs so that everyone can do something. We need to start talking like we can make it through.
I know we can.
Everything is so temporary in life and no matter how bad it seems, it can get worse, or better, in a heartbeat.
Hold on to your heart and breathe.
You are never alone. You are never done.
The sun comes up tomorrow, you will put one foot in front of the other, life goes on.
The only time we are defeated is when we allow the moment to defeat us and usually we do that when we give into the thoughts in our head telling us we CAN’T when, in truth, we CAN and we most often DO.
My husband always says, “As long as no-one dies, almost everything is fixable.” He immediately moves from the problem to solution mode and employs us in that action and suddenly we are out the other side, and we smile, and we let it go. There is tremendous healing in that. You face and deal with everything in life. Do what has to be done and then move on.
It is an amazing feeling of your own abilities and power.
It removes fear from life and eliminates so much of the drama.
It has let me focus on what is important to me. Love.
I am not sure where we had this disconnect, that people saying or doing something that is different from our own thoughts or choices, causes us to anger and direct that anger at the other person.
I don’t go to a restaurant and become enraged when other people at my table order something different to eat than what I do. Yet, if someone expressed an opinion that differs from yours or offers information that contradicts or changes your previously held ideas, people often lose it.
Listening is about being open minded. You listen, you consider, you share your ideas, you discuss, and if any of it is relevant, you wisely adjust your mindset, if not, you had an interesting conversation and you now better understand the other person, feel more firm in your understanding, and have probably enlightened and encouraged others regarding the subject discussed.
By the time I left school, I knew way more than I knew when I started. I learned because listening was forced in the beginning and then because I had to reason things out. I am not the person I was when I left school. I am not, because I have continued to read, to listen, to learn. Life is a journey. We don’t get handed “intelligence” as a definitive storage of items for our personal use. We all have to expand our understanding to include new advances in every area. Our experiences change our “knowing.” Our relationships impact us.
So WHY are we so afraid and upset when people share what they know or think?
WHY are we so hung up on all being on the same page?
It is not a competition. There is no prize for the most right answers.
All there is, is life, and our ability to use our understanding to love and connect with one another.
Next time you feel your blood boiling and you want to smash someone for the things they are saying, sit down, take a big breath, shut your mouth, and just listen. Listen. Maybe ask questions and instead of worrying about them trying to “convert” you to the dark side, try simply to understand who they are and why they think the way they do. How do they arrive at their conclusions.
You will be surprised how incredibly interesting people are, and how you will only grow and expand yourself by getting past that need to be right and shut everyone else down.